Today’s challenge was Musical Thoughts, where I had to put my negative thoughts to music. You can sing them, or just play them in your head.
I am having the thought that I have failed today. My meds have been reduced, and in return I’ve been an angry, angry bitch. I am having the thought that the next few weeks are not going to go very well. (Notice how I’m using “I’m having the thought that…”). As I was saying today was a day of some serious aggression. I was super anxious being out in public, and realized an item had been left off my prescription, so I had to go all the way to the doctors and get another one. That meant staying out in the scary outdoors even longer. So naturally, upon realizing this, I put my hands to my mouth and screamed into them like I would a pillow. I kicked a few puddles too. Super dramatic, but I was super irritated and anxious. That’s a bad combination, trust me.
As for musical thoughts, I didn’t have the memory or restraint to use them when I needed to. But I used them in calmer situations. I don’t feel like they helped but I’ll keep trying to use them. Though, I think another technique may work better for me. I did notice, when singing my thoughts to myself that I got annoyed when I couldn’t find a song they would work with. It didn’t stop me trying to make them work with the music though, so that kind of lessened the intensity of them.
I’ve already been in the habit of singing insults to myself. Don’t ask me why, I just have. But at least now I have a purpose. I wonder if singing “I’m having the thought that…” would be beneficial. Has anyone tried it?
Tomorrows mission: Naming Stories